Retro Review: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Introduction:

Welcome to my second retro review. The first was a few weeks ago of A Christmas Story. Briefly, a retro review is reviewing an older title now as though it was recently released. The goal is to facetiously, usually subtly, acknowledge the context of present day. As a 10+ year old, I watched the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon every Saturday morning. Granted, I lived in a rural area with little to do and we only picked up two channels (sort of a third if the weather was right). But what is not to love? Turtles. An animal I cannot recall a time I was not fascinated. Ninjas. Bruce Lee made martial arts cool in America and it never stopped being so. Mutants. The best way to make a sluggish four-legged reptile into an anthropomorph. Teenagers. Often a source of much comedy and drama. This review again follows "The Good, The Bad & The Ugly" format. Enough intro; let's get to it.

Retro Review: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)

The Good:

I am going to presume you know something about the sensation that is Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. On one side, there is the dark tone of the original comic book that started in 1984. On the other, there is the much lighter, much brighter cartoon that may yet find a permanent network home due to its popularity. Capitalizing on this fame, the independently produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, distributed by New Line Cinema, finds the sweet spot somewhere between. Like the comics, the tone is mostly somber, also lifting elements directly from them such as character origins and the retreat to the farmhouse. This mood is somewhat contrasted by aspects of the animated television series including the color-coded face masks, Michaelangelo's personality ("Michaelangelo is a party dude! [Party!]") and Splinter being more fatherly to the Turtles. A different medium usually necessitates a different approach. In other words, what might work well on the pages of a comic or even in animated form may not translate well to live action. This film does well at balancing a fantasy world containing four anthropomorphic turtles and one anthropomorphic rat with more grounded human characters, even making them our guides along the way. This is through the eyes of April O'Neil, adapted as a TV reporter investigating a crime wave sweeping New York City whom the Turtles save from the perpetrators, the Foot Clan. Sharing "guide" duties is Danny Pennington, a misguided teenager and son of April's boss, a character created for the film. He is one of many street kids being recruited into the Foot by The Shredder. With all that in place, it has a cohesive story with a natural flow, the most advanced costumes ever created by Jim Henson's Creature Shop, and a good fresh cast. To the latter end, onscreen, I particularly enjoy Judith Hoag as April and Elias Koteas as Casey Jones. He captures the immaturity of Casey without being annoying, a difficult line to walk. The voice acting for this type of film might be "make or break," and I am of the opinion they absolutely help sell the whole thing. Two of the Turtles' voice actors may be recognizable as child actors: Corey Feldman as Donatello (yes, that Corey Feldman whose films include Gremlins, The Goonies, and Stand By Me) and Robbie Rist as Michaelangelo (Rist infamously portrayed Cousin Oliver for the final six episodes of The Brady Bunch). A soundtrack of hip-hop, new jack swing, and electronic music drives the film along.

The Bad:

Those most familiar with the cartoon may feel the absence of Krang, Rocksteady and Bebop. Budgetary concerns must have contributed to this decision. Even without his robot body, that is another puppet for Krang, and two more complete animatronic costumes for the mutant rhino and warthog. Besides, it would likely be too crowded to properly let this origin story breathe, but try explaining that to a child. Speaking of which, since the two most well-known Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles outputs are that cartoon and a toy line, it is a no-brainer that the film's target demographic is children. Its level of violence may truly be only slightly more than the animated series, but this translates differently into live action. Subsequently, parent groups are apt to negatively criticize the film for this content. With the second biggest opening week for a film, only behind last year's Batman, we all know how this goes. As holders of the pocketbook, filmmakers will almost assuredly listen to the parental feedback and make a toned down sequel. I wish this were not so. It is not nearly the extreme of making a cartoon and marketing toys to children from truly adult works, as Rambo and the hyper-violent RoboCop have recently done, so let's just hope a happy medium is found.

The Ugly:

The turtle costumes and Splinter puppetry are very well done, there is no question there. Still, there are times it is unquestionable the turtle suits are rubber, most obvious with certain movements, and that Splinter is a puppet. This may take some viewers out of the moment.

Conclusion: 

“Cowabunga! Turtle Power!” Fans of the comic book or animated series, and especially those of both, should find a tone mostly balanced between serious and humor appropriate to live action presentation of the material. It is a concise origin story well told, well cast with actors well costumed. With four different personalities (turtlalities?) among the titular characters, it should be easy to find a relatable character (it’s Raph for me). However, those who only know the cartoon might be missing three of the regular antagonists and the rubber turtle suits and Splinter puppetry may create a tear in the illusion. Recommend: 8.5 pizzas out of 10.

Next week...the first in a series on underappreciated films!